Out here in Cali people can't seem to stop talking about ABC's The Bachelor's Jason Mesnick and his decision to leave his first pick, Melissa, for his original second choice, Molly.
I guess I'm not sure what people are upset about. He didn't really break up with Melissa on national television. (He had broken things off with her a week earlier, without cameras present.) And Jason could have easily had Molly - the girl he then asked out for coffee and to "try again" - slap his face on national television. Because he did after all dump her earlier and ask another woman to marry him.
But he risked his own possible rejection for another attempt at love. Will they make it? I have no idea. But I do know that Melissa at some point, if not already, will be happy Jason decided against marrying her. Because she had to know he wasn't 100% present with her. That Jason was looking back, comparing her to Molly and wondering.... When a guy isn't 100% present with the girl they are currently in a relationship with, it sucks. And there really isn't anything the girl can do, except hope at some point she can pull focus back to her. But generally just exhausts herself trying to keep him interested.
Yes - there is almost always at some point in any relationship, a little peering over the fence to see how green that grass over there looks. But if someone is constantly looking backwards, instead of forwards, it won't work. Almost a self-fulfilling prophecy that.
So I think Jason actually isn't a rat. I think he was a bit courageous in deciding to stop a relationship now instead of later - when he would "look" better. And also smart for realizing that time is precious. And that if he had waited longer, maybe Molly wouldn't have been around when he finally did make the split from Melissa.
| For another post about dating, see Musings of A Single Gal |
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